Tokyo’s Kobe Beef Kaiseki 511 Is The Best Place To Get Japanese Kobe Beef

Kobe Beef Kaiseki 511 was one of the restaurants on my must-try list before leaving Tokyo.  Try it or don’t leave Tokyo.  I was hoping for the later, but work and responsibility thing won’t leave me alone like a crazy ex-girlfriend. 

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511 is in a lane way.  The modern decor was second to the fridge with stacks on stacks on stacks of Kobe Beef.  It looked like a rap video with cash stacks in club.  But it was Kobe Beef instead of cash.  It reminded me of my younger years when I used to sit at home counting my rolls of pennies thinking I was a rich.

Background on Japanese Kobe & Wagyu beef:

To be able to sell Japanese Kobe beef, the merchant has to be an authorized dealer and 511 is an authorized dealer.  People often mistaken authentic Japanese Kobe Beef with Australian Wagyu, Kobe Style, or American Wagyu/Kobe.  There is a big difference between them like how there’s a big difference in the world’s view of the United States after Trump was elected President.  Seriously.

Japanese Kobe Beef is certified.  The beef can be traced online with a tracking number; in addition, Japan limits the export of Kobe beef.  In the States, I am only aware of a few restaurants that serve authentic Japanese Kobe Beef.   The biggest indicator of non-purebred Japanese Kobe/Wagyu Beef is the usage of it.  For example, nobody in their right mind would ground authentic Kobe Beef into a ground beef for a burger.  Those people should be hung for doing such a sinful thing.  Hung I tell ya!

Furthermore, Japan only slaughters about 3,000 cows a year with the Kobe Beef designation.  In addition, any respectable restaurant would not ground Japanese Wagyu or Kobe into a burger and then sell it for 15-20 USD.  It’s basic supply and demand.  It’s also common sense, which isn’t too abundant these days with all the ‘fake news’ going around.

Lastly, there’s a difference between Japanese Kobe Beef and Japanese Wagyu Beef.  The best way to put it would be ‘Kobe beef can be Wagyu, but Wagyu can’t be Kobe.’  Japanese Kobe or Japanese Wagyu is above the rest.  It’s the Michael Jordan of beef.  It’s the Tiger Woods of Beef.  Well, Tiger Woods before he went ape shit.

Now, 511’s food.  The restaurant offers pre-set Kaiseki meals with Japanese Prime Beef or Kobe Beef.  There is no fucking way in hell I was getting anything besides Japanese Kobe Beef.  The pre-set meal was served with a salad, miso soup, rice, and vegetables.  The sides were definitely tasty, but I’m here to discuss the Kobe beef.  Plus who gives a shit about salad?  I don’t believe in the nutritional facts about it.  I work with ‘alternative facts’ when it comes to food.

After my first bite, the hype and stories about Kobe beef are all true.  I was a born-again believer like a person praying to God while I was lying in my death-bed.  511 only serves sirloin cuts.  The beef’s marbling makes me want to smack every United States breeder in the face.  It was more than 50% of the steak and it had to be at least a 10 out of 12 on the Japanese scale.  It was a vibrant red versus a dark dirty red like American beef.

The flavor is insanely rich like Jeff Bezos.  The buttery texture was a guaranteed food coma.  It melted in my mouth like a tab of acid at a rave; it disappeared and I was left with an after taste of pure bliss.  It had me scream out-loud, “God damn!  The F*CK have you been all my life?!?”

Lastly, the service was definitely Michelin level.  I asked the waiter to bring out the steak for a picture and he happily obliged.  After 5 minutes, I had my picture to annoy people on social media.  With that said, one cannot go to Japan without having Japanese Kobe Beef.  It’s lunacy.

Welcome to Thunderdome, bitch!

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